The world responds to those who ask. When you begin to ask for what you need and want, you’ve taken control of your life—you are proactively steering its direction. Many wonderful and great things come to you as a result.But just how do you go about getting started asking? Here are the primary action steps to take:1. Act as if you expect to get it.
You need a solid level of certainty and expectation when you ask for something you want. This state of mind will affect everything else—your body posture, eye contact, tone of voice and choice of words. Think for a moment. You’ve been in situations when you’ve asked and had every certainty that you would receive exactly what you were asking for. Remember how you felt then? Keep that in your mind with every request you make.2. Ask someone who can give it to you.
Before you ask someone for something, make an assessment of whether or not they will be able to give it to you. Some people are very qualified and motivated to help. Others just aren’t capable of delivering. Watch people and review that capacity. Have you ever seen them capable of delivering what you’re about to ask them, or are you just hoping the potential is there?3. Get the other person’s full attention.
Your request deserves that respect! If the person cannot give you his or her full attention right then, set up an appointment—schedule time to talk in the very near future.4. Be clear and specific.
Be as concise as you possibly can in your requests. Ask for what you want, not for what you don’t want. At the same time, be careful what you ask for. More often than not, you get exactly what you’ve requested.5. Ask from the heart.
I believe you can have anything you want if you want it desperately enough. Keep that unbridled passion for your purpose, project or goal stirring in your soul as you begin to ask and maintain eye contact throughout the entire ask process. This further establishes your integrity, trustworthiness and passion on the subject.6. Ask with humor and creativity.
Humor captures our attention and breaks down our defenses. Creativity disarms our resistance and opens our minds to new possibilities.7. Give something to get something.
As Zig Ziglar says, “You can get everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want.” When you’re asking, always be sure to explain what’s in it for them, how they benefit and win because they’ve acted positively on your request.8. Ask repeatedly.
If someone says, “No!” you say, “Next!” Expect no’s—even on a repeated basis from the same people you’re asking. Your tenaciousness and perseverance will undoubtedly pay off.9. So you’ve asked and they still say no. Now what?
Don’t lose your cool when you’re faced with resistance. A powerful request can only be powerful if you’re also willing to be declined. Ask with authority, prepare yourself for a no, be gracious in receiving that no, then make one of two choices:• Ask the person you just made the request of to help you with a solution.They may know someone who can give you a yes and, given some freedom and respect from you, they often wander their own way into providing your yes.• Walk away without burning your bridges.You probably just came across someone who feasibly could not help you. The world is much too small and interconnected to lash out at even one person.Mark Victor Hansen November 17, 2015
Showing posts with label no. Show all posts
Showing posts with label no. Show all posts
Tuesday, 22 December 2015
Follow These 9 Steps to Ask for What You Want (and Actually Get It)
Thursday, 19 November 2015
10 Things Successful People Never Do Again
“Never go back.” What does that mean? From observations of successful people, clinical psychologist and author of Never Go Back: 10 Things You'll Never Do Again (Howard Books, June 2014), Dr. Henry Cloud has discovered certain “awakenings” that people have—in life and in business—that once they have them, they never go back to the old way of doing things. And when that happens, they are never the same. In short, they got it.
Source: http://ministry127.com/
“Years ago, a bad business decision of mine led to an interesting discussion with my mentor,” Dr. Cloud says. “I had learned a valuable lesson the hard way, and he reassured me: ‘The good thing is once you learn that lesson, you never go back. You never do it again.’
“I wondered, what are the key awakenings that successful people go through that forever change how they do things, which propel them to succeed in business, relationships, and life? I began to study these awakenings, researching them over the years.”
Although life and business have many lessons to teach us, Dr. Cloud observed 10 “doorways” of learning that high performers go through, never to return again.
Successful people never again…
1. Return to what hasn’t worked. Whether a job, or a broken relationship that was ended for a good reason, we should never go back to the same thing, expecting different results, without something being different.
2. Do anything that requires them to be someone they are not. In everything we do, we have to ask ourselves, “Why am I doing this? Am I suited for it? Does it fit me? Is it sustainable?” If the answer is no to any of these questions, you better have a very good reason to proceed.
3. Try to change another person. When you realize that you cannot force someone into doing something, you give him or her freedom and allow them to experience the consequences. In doing so, you find your own freedom as well.
4. Believe they can please everyone. Once you get that it truly is impossible to please everyone, you begin to live purposefully, trying to please the right people.
5. Choose short-term comfort over long-term benefit. Once successful people know they want something that requires a painful, time-limited step, they do not mind the painful step because it gets them to a long-term benefit. Living out this principle is one of the most fundamental differences between successful and unsuccessful people, both personally and professionally.
6. Trust someone or something that appears flawless. It’s natural for us to be drawn to things and people that appear "incredible." We love excellence and should always be looking for it. We should pursue people who are great at what they do, employees who are high performers, dates who are exceptional people, friends who have stellar character, and companies that excel. But when someone or something looks too good to be true, he, she, or it is. The world is imperfect. Period. No one and no thing is without flaw, and if they appear that way, hit pause.
7. Take their eyes off the big picture. We function better emotionally and perform better in our lives when we can see the big picture. For successful people, no one event is ever the whole story. Winners remember that – each and every day.
8. Neglect to do due diligence. No matter how good something looks on the outside, it is only by taking a deeper, diligent, and honest look that we will find out what we truly need to know: the reality that we owe ourselves.
9. Fail to ask why they are where they find themselves. One of the biggest differences between successful people and others is that in love and in life, in relationships and in business, successful people always ask themselves, what part am I playing in this situation? Said another way, they do not see themselves only as victims, even when they are.
10. Forget that their inner life determines their outer success. The good life sometimes has little to do with outside circumstances. We are happy and fulfilled mostly by who we are on the inside. Research validates that. And our internal lives largely contribute to producing many of our external circumstances.
And, the converse is true: people who are still trying to find success in various areas of life can almost always point to one or more of these patterns as a reason they are repeating the same mistakes.
Everyone makes mistakes…even the most successful people out there. But, what achievers do better than others is recognize the patterns that are causing those mistakes and never repeat them again. In short, they learn from pain—their own and the pain of others.
A good thing to remember is this: pain is unavoidable, but repeating the same pain twice, when we could choose to learn and do something different, is certainly avoidable. I like to say, “we don’t need new ways to fail….the old ones are working just fine!” Our task, in business and in life, is to observe what they are, and never go back to doing them again.
Source: http://www.success.com/article/10-things-successful-people-never-do-again
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)